The Boss meets Q
his Spiritual Director once more
- Hi Q.
-
Hi
Boss…. How goes?
The Boss sits down in the usual comfortable chair in Q’s study and, as ever, admires the icon on the wall beside him.
-
I
wont let myself be distracted by that wonderful icon.
Q nods.
-
The
thing is now that I am, kind of retired (sucks air threw his teeth noisily)…
need another word for retirement, but….the thing is, I feel that I should be
offering some kind of care to others, maybe part of a charity or whatever but I
don’t want to! And I feel guilty that I could be doing this good work but I
wont. I keep coming back to this question but a small voice inside says ‘No’.
-
Hmm,
how long has this been going on?
-
For
years but when I was working full-time I could resist this without feeling much
guilt. Indeed it was part of my fantasy retirement to do such good works but
no. And every time I pose the question to myself the answer still comes back as
‘No’… So I guess I have to trust it.
-
Hmm….
And what then?
-
What
then (Q nods) (the Boss sucks air in threw his teeth once more)…. Well, it
might sound stupid but…..but I feel something is going on for me spiritually which
I don’t truly understand – it may not even be helpful for me to understand it
just yet…. So I have to be patience but (the Boss grits his teeth) that is hard
for me!
-
Have
you been there before?
-
(The
Boss nods vigorously) Yes I have had moments of deep change in my life and they
have taken years to happen.
-
Ah.
-
Yes,
years and then it all makes sense. It feels like that I am in the middle of
such a change now and just have to have patience.
-
Where
else can you be?.... And what helps?
-
What
helps?..... Talking with you, friends and family. Making sure that I am not going
crazy…. Having some quiet times…. Long bikes and so on.
-
Sounds
like you know what to do.
-
Hmm
(grumpily) thought you say something like that.
-
Well….
If it true put it to use…. If it does not seem to be so let’s examine it again.
Meanwhile keep talking.
-
Yeah
(reluctantly).