Wednesday 14 November 2012

Postcards

Postcards

1) Woke up
Hung over
God what a night!
The singing
The drinking
The vomit
The fighting
Crawling home late very late

2) Taking the pledge
At least for today for tonight
Taking really talking
And listening really listening
What a strange creature she is

3) Out in the sun and rain
Calves aching and thirsty
Blissful sunset
A view to die for
Company OK

4) In my place again
The fire of conflict
The embers of desire
The cold splash of rejection
The bitter taste of sorry
Never again until again.

Wednesday 7 November 2012

The Boss once more consults Q his spiritual director


- Hi Q.

- Hi Boss.

Q was as ever sitting placidly and comfortably in an old armchair in his warm study which was almost like a like monk’s cell part from the overflowing bookshelves, the statue f Buddha, the Celtic Cross and some Greek icons.

There was as silence, a sense of calm in the air, an unhurriedness that sharply contrasted the jangliness that the Boss was feeling.

- Q, I’ve just fallen out with my church.

- Oh?

- Yes, not over theology or anything like that…. And I still enjoy worship when I go there… But it’s the people.

- Oh.

- Yes the people. I find them hard to be with and I don’t think they like me.

- Tell me more.

- Well I still care about some of them.. most of them… and I would do almost anything if someone was in trouble and I could help them. But I can’t do tasks for my church anymore. I just can’t…. (The Boss buried his head in his hands.)

- That’s OK.

- It is?

- Yes, it’s being truthful and that’s so important.

The Boss nodded unable to speak, unable to trust himself to speak without breaking down into tears.

- You know your favourite bit from Ecclesiastes?

- You mean ‘There’s a time to ever purpose under Heaven’?

- Yes…. Well. Try thinking of this in that way.

- There’s a purpose to my falling out with my church!?

- Yes.

- Oh…. So it’s not just my neurosis.

Q frowned at this phrase. He then said,

- Let’s suck it and see.

The Boss smiled at Q’s use of slang before asking plaintively

- But what do I do? …. It’s difficult being in this place I am now in.

- What else can you do? Where else can you be?

- Oh….hmm…nowhere.

- Then maybe that’s where you need to be, forgive me for saying that’s where God needs you to be.

- Oh….what on earth could God want me to be here for?

- Good question!

Q smiled, the Boss smiled rather weakly and breathed a bit more easily.

- You are always in God’s hands.

- I am.

- Even, or especially when you don’t know it.

The Boss nodded not trusting himself to speak. A deep silence enveloped the Boss and Q.